The Anatomy of a Midlife Crisis

When you reach all your goals in life, what is next ?

I woke up feeling different the first day of this year, and wondered. What happened to me ? What am I going to do now ? Where am I?

I thought it was just a phase.

Things I used to be passionate about lost its luster.

I realized that whatever I am doing now is not working. 

I made changes in my work life, got engaged to the man of my dreams, and even returned to my Alma mater to pursue a master's degree in Journalism. 

Still, I feel immense burn out.

My friendships faded out.

Things felt boring.

I stopped traveling so much.

I stopped shopping, despite being a shopaholic.

My habits and feelings have changed.

I live now a very boring, quiet life and spend a lot of time in nature.

My life is not so instagrammable anymore.

I even feel differently about social media.

My life has slowed down.

It seems like everything in my life, except my desire for marriage and children with my dream guy, is being tremendously overhauled.

 

I did not notice my midlife transition. It was swift.

For the past several months, I found myself resisting the natural life changes.

Bathed in panic and struggling to manage what is happening to me.

I quickly realized.

This is the hallmark of a midlife crisis.

I even took up therapy this past autumn to find out if I was going bananas, and much to my surprise, I was not!

My midlife crisis is something I take in stride, despite it being a major inconvenience.

Letting go of my identity as a strong, independent, single, childless woman is immensely difficult.

I am still not out of my midlife transition. 

I never went through this process, and I have not been aware of being in this stage

I just simply started having a lot of Aha! moments and sorting out the missing pieces in my life.

There are stages of this midlife transition.

The first step is letting go of the old and what is not working anymore. This is a goal for the year for me.

Going through the in-between stage is a major challenge. I feel stuck, and trying to get unstuck is key.

The final stage is the new beginning. 

I don't know when this new beginning is going to start, but I am patient and understand that life does not work on a timescale or a clock.

Life just happens.

Things happen, while life ebbs and flows 

2025 has been a major roller coaster ride with a fireworks show at the end of the trip as soon as I got off.

I don't know how long I will be in the in-between stage.

I am going to stay curious and keep educating myself. 

That will help me move forward in my life.

I know there are specific changes I want to make in my life.

Major, big changes in life don't happen overnight.

Some things require taking your time with it. 

I am not going to erase my old identity, but I am not going to let it be so dominant. 

Newer parts of my life need space to grow. 

I waited my whole life to enter my 30s, and now that I am here it feels like moving into a completely empty luxury apartment... and loving not having any furniture in it yet. 

It is time for something new to manifest and grow.

Not everything is in full clarity for me. 

This stage of my life is about building towards that desired self.

I don't know what will happen or what will be, but I do know that change is good. 

What I have been doing is just being vocal and sharing what I am going through with those I trust, like friends and family. 

Discussion is key.

Talking about things I am interested in at the moment is key.

I am not going to talk so much about fashion and beauty anymore, or focus my energy there.

I am speaking from my heart and my passions seem to lie in weddings, relationships, interior design, and entrepreneurship.

I am reshaping my life and creating more transparency in all aspects of my life.

I am done spending my time in spaces that are unfulfilling. 

I want to spend time with truly authentic people who speak their minds and lead their lives with honesty. 

Everything does not have to be polished all the time, and while noting still having certain values, I will take this new chapter in my life in stride.

I do love animals a lot, so maybe my fiancé and I should adopt a puppy?

Being more in alignment with things that feel right is a goal for me as well as simplyfing my life within reason. As a maximalist, I want more peace of mind and to simplify my life in a way that allows me to live up to my ideals and values.

I am going to take time to figure this all out.